Somewhere it makes me think

I don’t know what to think these days? Life changes everyday and things become new or old, perhaps its just something that makes me think?

In my world, things don’t seem the same as they were in the past, the future looks strange in a way that means new things area subjected to challenges in life’s mysterious ways. It’s something that we all have to learn, good or bad. It’s our own challenges that either make us wonder what life carries into the future as there is no turning back the clock on the past of life.

I’m so indebted with life it sometimes make wonder where we are headed into the future? – as there is no turning back the clock on the past, it almost seems like a purgatory world of one’s thoughts?

I feel “lost” at times with life, but, seriously I often think its not often understood well with one’s common sense. I recently lost my Grandmother to Cancer last year and her anniversary of creeping up the ladder to her first year in passing – the loss of my grandmother had actually tipped the scales in many ways, that, it now has a hold of my own mother with diabetes and kidney problems, compared to my grandmother’s battle with cancer.

I’m sorta on the revolt with life and the cadre of changes among the history of my family. As I growth into my later years of life, like is starting to bedevil me in ways, I can’t explain to my own mother or for her to understand.

She knows, I’m starting to take notice of how her life if going now, but, than, I still get a scare here and there from time to time, when she and my step-dad tend to take off and not let me know where they are going and when to expect them to be back – which is now entirely becoming a known habit for them. As you could, say – “I’m probably being a little poppyseed” at them for not keeping tabs on there whereabouts before they leave town on rides and more.

You better believe it. It’s starting to look that way with the way their health is now. I’m getting to the nervous point of time, where things can get pretty hairy of them not letting me know where they’re going and when they’re expecting to be back. With them both into their sixties and my into my mid forties, all sorts of sorties can run rampant like wild stinger missiles out of nowhere.

Perhaps, I’m just an old tomcat that worries too much?


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